It's official, The Guardian Books Blog is my favourite blog and Carol Rumens my favourite contributor.Why? She's promoting Robert Burns' To a Louse as the Poem of the Week.
Ms Rumens writes "His mastery is exhibited in this week's poem, "To a Louse", chosen in preference to the equally delightful but extremely well-known "To a Mouse". The speaker's tone here is understandably less tender to the object of his address. The movement of the verse is wonderfully tetchy and jumpy. But as the argument develops, we see that Jeanie's airs and graces are mocked by her unsavoury guest. And of course, Burns sneaks in a neat touch of anti-clericalism for good measure. Readers wishing to enjoy more of the bard in Calvinist-baiting vein may like to sample Holy Willie's Prayer - with the help of Michaelian's Glossary, of course."
To A Louse
To A Louse
On Seeing One On A Lady's Bonnet, At Church
Ha! whaur ye gaun, ye crowlin ferlie?
Your impudence protects you sairly;
I canna say but ye strunt rarely,
Owre gauze and lace;
Tho', faith! I fear ye dine but sparely
On sic a place.
Ye ugly, creepin, blastit wonner,
Detested, shunn'd by saunt an' sinner,
How daur ye set your fit upon her-
Sae fine a lady?
Gae somewhere else and seek your dinner
On some poor body.
Swith! in some beggar's haffet squattle;
There ye may creep, and sprawl, and sprattle,
Wi' ither kindred, jumping cattle,
In shoals and nations;
Whaur horn nor bane ne'er daur unsettle
Your thick plantations.
Now haud you there, ye're out o' sight,
Below the fatt'rels, snug and tight;
Na, faith ye yet! ye'll no be right,
Till ye've got on it-
The verra tapmost, tow'rin height
O' Miss' bonnet.
My sooth! right bauld ye set your nose out,
As plump an' grey as ony groset:
O for some rank, mercurial rozet,
Or fell, red smeddum,I
'd gie you sic a hearty dose o't,
Wad dress your droddum.
I wad na been surpris'd to spy
You on an auld wife's flainen toy;
Or aiblins some bit dubbie boy,
On's wyliecoat;
But Miss' fine Lunardi! fye!
How daur ye do't?
O Jeany, dinna toss your head,
An' set your beauties a' abread!
Ye little ken what cursed speed
The blastie's makin:
Thae winks an' finger-ends, I dread,
Are notice takin.
O wad some Power the giftie gie us
To see oursels as ithers see us!
It wad frae mony a blunder free us,
An' foolish notion:
What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us,
An' ev'n devotion!
Notes: ferlie= a wonder or marvel
strunt=swagger
wonner=a wonder (contemptuous)
haffet=lock of hair at the temple
sprattle=scramble
fatt'rels=ribbon-ends
groset=gooseberry
rozet=resins
meddum=spirit
dress=chastise
droddum=backside
breech, aiblins=perhaps
toy=woman's old-fashioned cap with ear-flaps
dubbie=muddy
wyliecoat=flannel vest.
Ha! whaur ye gaun, ye crowlin ferlie?
Your impudence protects you sairly;
I canna say but ye strunt rarely,
Owre gauze and lace;
Tho', faith! I fear ye dine but sparely
On sic a place.
Ye ugly, creepin, blastit wonner,
Detested, shunn'd by saunt an' sinner,
How daur ye set your fit upon her-
Sae fine a lady?
Gae somewhere else and seek your dinner
On some poor body.
Swith! in some beggar's haffet squattle;
There ye may creep, and sprawl, and sprattle,
Wi' ither kindred, jumping cattle,
In shoals and nations;
Whaur horn nor bane ne'er daur unsettle
Your thick plantations.
Now haud you there, ye're out o' sight,
Below the fatt'rels, snug and tight;
Na, faith ye yet! ye'll no be right,
Till ye've got on it-
The verra tapmost, tow'rin height
O' Miss' bonnet.
My sooth! right bauld ye set your nose out,
As plump an' grey as ony groset:
O for some rank, mercurial rozet,
Or fell, red smeddum,I
'd gie you sic a hearty dose o't,
Wad dress your droddum.
I wad na been surpris'd to spy
You on an auld wife's flainen toy;
Or aiblins some bit dubbie boy,
On's wyliecoat;
But Miss' fine Lunardi! fye!
How daur ye do't?
O Jeany, dinna toss your head,
An' set your beauties a' abread!
Ye little ken what cursed speed
The blastie's makin:
Thae winks an' finger-ends, I dread,
Are notice takin.
O wad some Power the giftie gie us
To see oursels as ithers see us!
It wad frae mony a blunder free us,
An' foolish notion:
What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us,
An' ev'n devotion!
Notes: ferlie= a wonder or marvel
strunt=swagger
wonner=a wonder (contemptuous)
haffet=lock of hair at the temple
sprattle=scramble
fatt'rels=ribbon-ends
groset=gooseberry
rozet=resins
meddum=spirit
dress=chastise
droddum=backside
breech, aiblins=perhaps
toy=woman's old-fashioned cap with ear-flaps
dubbie=muddy
wyliecoat=flannel vest.
And here's the YouTube clip (not the best quality in the audio but it'll give you the gist of it)
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